09 Feb 2026
20m

Why "we should hang out" won't make you real friends

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Life Kit

This episode of Life Kit explores strategies for making new friends as an adult. Kat Vellos, author of "We Should Get Together: The Secret to Cultivating Better Friendships," shares advice on identifying potential friends by trusting one's "friendship intuition" and seeking out feelings of warmth and curiosity. The discussion emphasizes the importance of acting quickly on initial connections and suggests specific, engaging activities beyond generic coffee dates to foster deeper bonds. Vellos cites research indicating that spending concentrated time early in a friendship is crucial for its development. The episode also addresses navigating rejection and offers alternative questions to "How are you?" to facilitate more meaningful conversations.

Outlines

Part 1: Foundations, Intuition

Part 2: Taking Action, Making Moves

Part 3: Overcoming Obstacles, Deepening Bonds

Part 4: Summary

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